So- seriously- this is what I’ve learned.

I am playing around instead of journeying.  My bags aren’t packed.

I have not got provisions for travel.

And whenever I look ahead, I am daunted by the distances I need to go.

I am a toddler, refusing to hold the Hand offered,

choosing my own way, which is mainly in dizzying circles,

all centered around myself.

If I was chronicling my life John Bunyan style,

I would name myself Slothly and write up a

description of a sly-eyed,slow moving,selfish and

pudgy woman who ignores good advice but announces

her good intentions with regularity to any one willing to listen.

If I found myself in Lewis’ Narnian Chronicles, I’d be a

Dwarf.

Because,  “the dwarves are for the dwarves!”

And looking in a mirror, I am turning away from what I see.

Not very attractive.

I’ve been hurt and I’m tired and leery about being hurt again.

I need repair.

I am depressed.

And I can’t do this on my own.

I am so thankful that God is a God of mercy

and redemption.  And Grace.

And that His is the Hand I’m reaching for-

His is the direction I’m following…

slowly behind.

And that He is in the business of transformation.

Day by day.